Dr. John Gottman and his team came to an interesting conclusion when it comes to husbands’ behavior in the relationship. They shared that relationships are much more successful when men allow themselves to be influenced by their partner. Accepting influence is important for women too, but the research has shown that the majority of women already do this.
Why is Accepting Influence So Important for a Happy Relationship?
When you allow influence by your partner, you have to let go of avoidant strategies, such as attacking or defensiveness. Accepting influence means that you’re acknowledging your partner’s needs and showing them they’re important to you. You’re shifting from “me” to “we” position. This is especially true for men, as they find accepting influence a more difficult task compared to women. Allowing themselves to accept influence by their partner moves their relationship forward towards greater satisfaction. At the same time, they’re becoming more mature and secure in the process.
Here is the part of their article that gives some insight into how to make your relationship more successful:
“Our research shows that the more open you are to accepting influence from your partner, the stronger the positive perspective, mutual respect, and trust will be in your relationship. Having these components in your relationship helps you and your partner to face the world together. As a couple, you’ll gain confidence that comes from being supported and feeling that you are a part of a team.”
Read the whole article here: https://www.gottman.com/blog/husband-can-influential-accept-influence/